As we embark on the last week of our high school journey, we reflect on the many memories formed here: countless conversations, unforgettable laughter and absurd reviews. In order to put a bow on the close of senior year, our Broken Compass group compiled numerous awards to give to some of the best spots in the building. Starting with water fountains, continuing with bathrooms and now ending with building awards, it is with great honor and privilege to present to you our final school-related review.

Best-Decorated Classroom

Many teachers pride themselves on the decor of their classrooms, which means it can be very hard to pick just one as the “Best-Decorated,” yet this choice came easily for us because, quite frankly, how can you beat a suit of armor? Latin teacher Tom Herpel’s classroom is beautifully decorated with student creations and Roman memorabilia. Hand-painted tiles of the Roman Pantheon cover the ceiling, a mural of the Roman Forum sprawls across the wall and maps of ancient Italy hang regally. There’s plenty to keep a wandering eye interested, and not all of it is Latin related. Herpel also has tasteful sports decor, which complements the more classical displays nicely. This room has a lot of unique character that has clearly been cultivated over the years and helped along by the hundreds of students who walk through his doors.

Most Dubious Stain

Previously mentioned in our bathroom review, the weird orange-brown stain marring the third floor boys bathroom wins the award for “Most Dubious Stain.” We chose this stain as the winner due to us never hearing its origin story. For all we know it was here before the school was. Where did it come from? Is it some super fungus? Did someone spill their nasty vape juice? These are the questions we ask ourselves frequently when journeying into the third floor art bathroom to relieve oneself. Also, the color of it is just disturbing–its bold orange and brown palette is striking against its checkered background. If anyone knows why this exists, please let us know.

Bathroom Most Likely to Walk Into a Group Juul Session

The bathroom should be a serene and private area. This is the place you seek when you actually have to go to the bathroom or when you want to waste time or—most of all—when you need that Juul break. If you want to participate in putting USB sticks in your mouth with others, choose none other than the first-floor music bathroom. You even get complimentary ASMR treatment from all of the coughing and deep inhaling. Unless you’re interested in a herd of students blocking the urinals, taking up stalls and admiring their vape tricks in the mirror, avoid this restroom. There is no privacy here, so if you value that, you might want to look into finding a different “Juul room.”

Route Most Vulnerable to Aggressive Geese Attacks

The Peace Garden is a beautiful oasis amongst the many bricks of West High. Whether you’re trying to get to class, get away from class or enjoy lunch, it’s hard to go wrong in the Peace Garden. Unfortunately, we aren’t the only creatures who think the Peace Garden is a great place to hang out. Pick the right time of year for your Peace-Garden-get-away, and you might just find yourself in the middle of West High’s most dangerous locale. The geese of West aren’t known to be particularly friendly, so tread with caution if you dare to make a Peace Garden journey.

Best Smelling Room

We love food, and we’re sure many others do as well. Yes, it is nutritional, which is important, but let’s be real, who eats food based solely on nutrition? The combination of taste and smell is what compels people to choose what to eat. The aroma of food is incomparable to any other perfume, cologne, deodorant or lotion which is exactly why the International Cuisine room wins this award. No other room makes you crave curiosity more than International Cuisine.

Best Napping Lounge

Ever since the library’s renovations and additions, it is hands-down the highest quality napping lounge available. They have it all: the cushions, the perfect temperature, the silence. The librarians are basically asking us to sleep there. In fact, I used to sleep there every day when I had study hall. You’d be surprised to see how many sleep-deprived students get their beauty sleep in the library.

Staircase Most Likely to Slip Down

All it takes is one rainy day for the wet tracks of hundreds of students and staff to be spread across the floors of West High. This can make for some squeaky floors and slippery staircases, but one staircase is extra dangerous. Due to its well-worn surfaces and convenient location across from the front entrance, the stairwell by counseling wins West High’s “Most Likely to Slip Down.” I’ve seen it a dozen times: barely awake students stumbling through the halls clutching their thermoses of caffeine get a rude awakening when their feet suddenly shoot out from underneath them. Though this staircase was recently waxed, time will tell just how long these countermeasures last.

From the top to the bottom, around every corner and inside every classroom, there’s something interesting happening at West High. If there was anything we hoped to accomplish with our reviews— other than making you laugh—it was to encourage you to take a second and take in the building and the people around you. Afterall, you only get four years at West