The Official Student News Site of Parkway West High

Pathfinder

The Official Student News Site of Parkway West High

Pathfinder

The Official Student News Site of Parkway West High

Pathfinder

Meet the Geese 2: Geesepocalypse

The geese are back for another run, and while their numbers are not nearly as abundant as they were last spring, the fiendish fowl that remain have certainly put themselves front and center for the student body to observe.

ANGRY ARNOLD

 

Famous for his daily sidewalk patrols in front of the school, Arnold’s return to West greeted him with the stunning realization that students actually knew to avoid him. And what a frightening thought that was: no more freshman to chase, no more seniors to screech at, not a soul daring to tread his territory in front of the school. Arnold had to relocate, and relocate he did. Now, when he’s not honking around in front of the school, he can be found screeching at other birds on the school’s roof or… biting at the glass doors around the courtyard? In an attempt to get every single student to fear him, Arnold has repeatedly entered the courtyard and stood in front of the windows during lunch. He’ll honk, bite and flap at the students inside as if trying to fight each and every one of them individually. We get it, Arnold, you’re angry.

 

CORNER CENTER-STAGE CATHY

While Cathy hid in a nestled-away corner last school year, this year, Cathy chose to let her eggs hatch just right in front of the same window that her screechy S.O., Arnold, parades around in front of. She didn’t seem to be a fan of the school paparazzi that watched her march about with her babies, and thus didn’t stay long. Soon after all of her eggs had hatched, Cathy was off, taking only a moment more to linger around the windowed doors before waddling off with her new family into the suburbs of West County. No one quite knows her current location, but rumors say that she’s still putting herself right where people can see her…all too much. Cathy has been spotted crossing neighborhood roads all over the place with her goslings, stopping traffic the second her webbed feet hit the pavement.

 

ROOFTOP RITA

Rita is a good parent. Every moment is spent on patrol or on her egg, often snipping at wayward branches that dare to flap around in the wind. Last year, Rita had four eggs, two of which hatched and proceeded to follow her around the rooftop until they were old enough to glide off with their mother. This year, Rita’s nest is only inhabited by one egg alongside Rita herself. Rita did everything she could to protect her one egg, taking special care to attack the water bottle that somehow ended up on the roof. Even though she does her best to keep her nest clean, students just won’t leave her alone; from the math classrooms, students have repeatedly tried to throw paper airplanes at her and her nest, leaving her stretch of rooftop littered with failed air attacks.

 

RITA’S EGG

And even though Rita may have done everything she possibly could to watch over her egg, even the best of us are unsuccessful sometimes. After weeks and weeks of careful guarding, protecting, and warming, Rita’s single egg did not hatch. We will never forget you, little egg.

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About the Contributor
Hannah Hoffmann, TECHNICAL EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

Grade: 12

 

Years on staff: 4

 

Life soundtrack: "With Any Sort Of Certainty" by Toh Kay.

 

Most passionate about: "Disorders and dysfunctions of the brain, because I'm weird. If anyone wants a free amygdala, they're welcome to take mine."

 

Favorite dance move: "Doing the whip at inappropriate times."

 
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Meet the Geese 2: Geesepocalypse